Sunday, January 16, 2011

SOME SHITS.

Most recent about me:
I have so many thoughts yet so little space. If you’re going to read this, be open minded or forever be ignorant. Don’t expect to know too much ‘about me’ by the end of this. Ahoy, I’m Jamie Dee and I’m 15 years old. I believe I am part of the minority of my age group that has matured a little too soon. A lot of people my age seem to be going out, getting really drunk all the time and it’s like I’ve already went through that phase. Don’t get me wrong though, I like to drink alcohol because it helps me gain confidence. I would love to be an outgoing, confident and completely content person, but I’m not. Instead I’m a shy, self-concious person in ‘real life’ around people I’m not familiar with. This sometimes holds me back from making new friends. Sometimes people ask me how I deal with loosing friends and getting hate, at the end of the day you just have to think to yourself ‘would I want to be friends with people that have such a disgusting personality anyway? no’. I think I’m extremely open minded and I would hate to judge someone without speaking to them first because I know what it feels like to be judged by people you don’t know. I don’t have any favourites. I don’t have a favourite colour, a favourite food, a favourite type of dress sense, a favourite type of music ect.. I think it’s because of how broad my taste is. I can be really happy and talkative and I can be really pissy and ignorant, I don’t choose to be that way. I’m far from wealthy but I’m not in the slightest ashamed, I look at it as an incentive to make something of myself. I have huge aspirations. I like to think of myself as a strong individual in many ways and like to maintain a positive persona, I can come across as if I don’t give a fuck, even if something is killing me inside. I find it difficult to let people in enough to trust them, but once you’re in, you’ll probably be a friend of mine for a long period of time. Most peoples main goals in life are: get a good job, get a nice house and car, get married and have kids, my goals are completely different. I don’t care about how rich I am, as long as I have enough to live life comfortably. I don’t care about how much my job pays, aslong as I end up doing something that I enjoy! and finally I just want to do everything I want to during life. I don’t want to be an OAP sitting in a rocking chair, stating all the things I’d wish I’d done when I was younger. Carpe diem! seize the day. Lastly, I hate relationships. Why tie yourself down at such a young age? there will be a point in your life when you’ll get married, have kids ect so be single, have fun and freedom while it lasts. You don’t need to be dead serious in love to cuddle up with someone and watch a film with them, save yourself the heart break. I hope you haven’t formed too much of an opinion on me, after all I’m just an average boy, blogging my interests and things I find fascinating/beautiful. Don’t judge me either, just because I have a high number of followers does not mean I’m arrogant or stuck up, I’m quite the opposite. Ciao!
Old about me:
it’s been a while since i’ve thought about how i can put myself into words. i can’t fully describe myself to you, but i can be honest and give you a rough impression of my personality, that’s if you’re reading with an open mind. i’m generally a positive character, but i do have my downfalls, like everyone else. i’ve given up trying hard to please everyone, defend myself and trying to make people be friends with me. i’ve learned that life will naturally take its course. i went through dark times of hatred and depression but i can honestly say i’m now a stronger person. i have big aspirations which seems to be unusual in my home town of sunderland. i want to move away and make something of my life, i don’t want to stay here and watch the same boring people grow old. i’m not being big headed here, but some people seem to think a lot of me. don’t ever think i’m better than you, because i’m not, i’m equal to everyone else. i’ve came from a shit background but i learned to live with it, it wont stop me from making a decent life for me and my future family, i will break the cycle of council houses, benefits and just managing to get by. i remember the time when there was just me and my father living together, he was so poor that we had to walk around a mile each week to go get to ‘aldi’ for our weekly shopping. i’m not ashamed that i’m not wealthy, it just gives me the sheer motivation to try harder to finally have a decent, happy-go-lucky life. i like to maintain a strong persona, whining on about my problems isn’t going to solve anything, although, if i’m honest, i do like attention. in life i’ve lost a lot of friends for accepting myself, wearing what i want and listening to the music i love ect. but on the whole: it’s helped me feel comfortable in myself and move on and make new friends with the same interests. if your friends can’t accept you for who you are then seriously, who will? i love to be organised but fail as i have a lack of enthusiasm. you will be lucky to see my bedroom floor the majority of the time. i can be a very loving and affectionate person. i adore making people feel better about themselves because i know what it’s like to hit rock bottom and hate yourself. daym this is personal. ok, cons about me. i let certain people into my life too easy. i give people trust without thinking and that usually back fires on me. i get scared of this thing called ‘love’, i don’t want to settle down with someone this young, i just want someone i can have a good time with, can smile with and make memories with. i may have alot of followers but please don’t think that makes me arrogant, it just makes me feel lucky. after reading this i hope you haven’t formed too much of an opinion on me as i’d rather you find out what i’m like for yourself. 
My list of favourite things:
tumblr, little animal elastic bands, nice pairs of socks, aftershave that smells lovely all day long, really sweet and milky tea, french fancies, caramel frappichinos, blackberry bold 9700, topman, acoustic songs, skinny jeans that are so tight you loose circulation in your thighs, bombay bicycle club, gig tickets, halloween, house partys, them red disposable cups that you always see in movies, marianas trench, milka popping candy chocolate, duty free, vintage shops, menthol cigarettes, jack daniels and coke, reese cups, weheartit, winter, christmas, looking at the time and seeing 11:11, tan lines, that feeling when you’ve been out in the snow all day and you come home to sit by the fire with a knitted blanket and some hot chocolate, nails that are cut(not bitten off), charity shops, old knitted jumpers, the guitar that sits in the corner of my room that i can’t play, magnetic man, laura marling, gabrielle aplin, hayley williams, beautiful landscapes that literally leave you speechless, taking so many photos, getting something you’ve wanted for so long, really pretty people that don’t know it, shyness, cuddling up to someone, dvd nights in, a day to remember, times when you enjoy being alone, hopes and dreams, the people you can actually trust and rely on, old clothes that you can cut up and wear again, when something you see/read makes you say ‘oh my god’ or ‘wow’ out loud, finding beauty in the smallest things, grateful people, pale colours, tanned skin, naturally curly hair, a day to remember, the xx, crystal castles, lookbook, cherry bakewells, french fancies, good hair days, meaningful tattoos, ke$ha, the moments you never forget.

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